FANDOM


From Youtube

Description Edit

Now available! http://www.rifftrax.com/no-retreat-no-surrender

An organized crime syndicate is attempting to muscle out all the karate dojos in the country with the aid of deadly Russian black belt, and it’s up to the new kid in town and his breakdancing sidekick to defeat them, if the local bully doesn’t stop him first!

Here is a test: at which point in the above sentence did you realize the film was a product of the 80s?

A. After “Karate Dojos” B. After “Deadly Russian” C. After “Breakdancing sidekick” D. I actually thought it was a Sofia Coppola film from the late 2000s

If you answered A, B, or C, then congratulations! Your senses have been honed to detect the fine subtleties of 80s cheese and you are going to enjoy the hell out of No Retreat, No Surrender. “Borrowing” the jingoism of Rocky IV and pretty much everything else from The Karate Kid, it adds the baffling twist of having our hero learn karate from the ghost of Bruce Lee. It is the second most unrealistic thing in the movie after having Jean Claude Van Damme portray a Russian.

Co-starring other 80s staples such as the fat guy who is always eating (otherwise viewers might not have noticed that he is fat) and training montages that out-parody every training montage parody you’ve ever seen, No Retreat, No Surrender will get you so pumped up you’ll be tempted to forgive Van Damme for Street Fighter. All that’s missing is a ponytailed, toxic waste dumping millionaire to deem it: “Perfect…”

Appears on these pages
of

File history

Click on a date/time to view the file as it appeared at that time.

Date/TimeThumbnailDimensionsUserComment
current04:38, October 17, 2015Thumbnail for version as of 04:38, October 17, 201501:33480 × 269 (17 KB)Sugarraydodge (wall | contribs)created video

Metadata

Ad blocker interference detected!


Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.